So – a New Year and a fresh start. Many people make New Year’s resolutions, only to falter and fail long before the year is out. I know I have done so in the past and it is extremely disheartening. My friend Wayne (read his blog here) calls this “one of the most self-destructive times of the whole year”.
To try to avoid this downslide into disappointment, I have decided to carry on my tradition of making at least one resolution I know I will be able to keep. Last year I resolved not to climb Mount Everest, and I was spectacularly successful. This year I am resolving not to buy another horse. More difficult, but with my family’s help, particularly that of my husband, I feel I have a good chance of success.
On a more serious note, I have some other resolutions. Not the “lose weight, make more money” kind of resolutions, but rather ones that are harder to quantify but may in fact have a bigger positive impact on my life.
I resolve to like myself more. Not love myself, I think we all do that even if we don’t acknowledge it. But like myself. Not as easy to do as it may sound – it’s going to take effort, and I’ll have to cultivate the ability to forgive myself more readily for what I perceive as my shortcomings.
I resolve to find, make or steal more time for my friends. This is an important one, and feeds into the first one. Often my friends are the ones who help me see that the things I am rebuking myself for or obsessing over, are not so bad after all. They restore my sense of perspective. Also, I hate feeling guilty about neglecting my friends, and I need to stop that if I am to like myself more.
I resolve to be kinder to people. This pertains to my family in particular, as they often take the brunt of my frustrations that are engendered elswhere. But I also want to be more mindful of how I treat everyone I interact with, and try to be pleasant and positive as much as possible. Again, this links back to resolution #1 .
Those are the big three – I hope I can be successful to some degree with all of them, but I realize it takes time to make inner changes, and so I am not going to limit myself to just this year. I plan to keep working on them for the rest of my life.
Happy New Year to you and yours,